Friday, July 16, 2010

Challenge

I'm going to try not to use my husband's shortcomings (no matter how amusing or how innocently I portray them) in anymore posts.

It will be hard because I tend to be on the anecdotal side when writing and it will be challenging to present some of my ideas (like the completion of husband and wife) without it, but I will try to do that.

However, men in general are not safe.

Excuse me because I think my son finally did what I have been expecting him to do since he could crawl - eating the cat food. My sister and I were doing that so much earlier than him!

(The challenge came from Blooming Grace)

5 comments:

Elusive Wapiti said...

"I'm going to try not to use my husband's shortcomings (no matter how amusing or how innocently I portray them) in anymore posts"

A wise decision.

I'm certain that (a) he doesn't enjoy reading about his shortcomings on line; (b) broadcasting his shortcomings is not respectful and honoring of him; and (c) you have just as many shortcomings as he, I suspect.

MarkyMark said...

If you can follow your challenge (i.e. refrain from saying negative things about your husband), that'll be a good start. How about a bigger challenge? If you can't say something good about him, don't say anything at all.

For me, if you love someone, you'll do them good; you'll try to bless them any way you can, not hurt them. Bashing someone is hurtful; no matter how you slice it, it's a hurtful act-end of story.

One thing that soured me on women in general was the incessant man bashing I've heard them engage in. When I worked with women, I'd hear them bash their men for HOURS! While I know I'm far from perfect, I also know that I'm not a bad guy; in fact, I'm a pretty good guy. The question I always asked myself was this: do I want someone talking like that about me? The answer was always no.

matthew5sixteen said...

Hi Christina,

This is a little bit off topic, but I'd like to talk about something close to me.

I have mostly Christian friends. Two of my male friends are married. Their wives happen to be my friends, too. The thing is, having heard all of the stories on MRA/MGTOW sites, I have a sense of negativity about their marriages. What I mean is, I have a nagging feeling that just because it didn't go so well for some other men out there, that my friends' marriages might not go well, either. Do you have any advice on how to deal with that? I hope that my friends' marriages will last and they won't get divorced, but the statistics on divorce that I read about are just so bad. Especially the statistics that indicate Christian divorce rates are higher than secular divorce rates.

Christina said...

I'm certain that (a) he doesn't enjoy reading about his shortcomings on line; (b) broadcasting his shortcomings is not respectful and honoring of him; and (c) you have just as many shortcomings as he, I suspect.

EW, its hard, cuz I like being realistic (with a twist of idealism lol). I like it that neither of us is perfect but we work well anyway. And I like illustrating that for others to see - that this is a marriage of two human beings and it is working.

I've read some of the other blogs that you link to and I'm so jealous of those women that write them because they sound so perfectly graceful and demure, though with the strength of character and faith that makes them truly role models.

They sound like Mrs. Allan in Anne of Green Gables or Elizabeth in Little Women.

And it makes them sound perfect even though I know they aren't.

I have never liked sounding perfect. I grew up being called a "Goody-two-shoes" and being shunned by friends because they thought I thought I was better than them.

I was a good girl (and to some degree, I still am), but I was good because I wanted to do what was right - not because I wanted to be perfect.

As an adult, I don't want to come across as perfect - and I don't want my marriage to come across as perfect - I want it to be seen for what it really is - two flawed human beings trying to make a life together - and let God's grace, mercy, and forgiveness to shine through it.

Does that make sense?

Marky Mark,

If you can follow your challenge (i.e. refrain from saying negative things about your husband), that'll be a good start. How about a bigger challenge? If you can't say something good about him, don't say anything at all.

I'm having trouble distinguishing between the two >.< lol. That may be for the best. Think Thumper's lesson in Bambi "If you can't say something nice, than don't say anything at all."

Bashing someone is hurtful; no matter how you slice it, it's a hurtful act-end of story.

I have never intended to "bash" and if I have done so, I hugely regret it. I'm under the impression that my love for my husband is apparent. And I believe that there is something more powerful about love that sees the flaws and keeps on loving anyway vs a love that thinks the flaws don't exist at all.

And as far as man bashing goes, it makes me uncomfortable and I have stopped going to a women's group because that's what they started doing - though I suspect it wasn't their intention. They thought they were looking out for me, but I felt like they were voicing something else.

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